Author: Elsa

Dear Elsa,

I have been married for a little over a year. When I was dating, I knew my husband would never live anywhere other than his family’s land, and I told him I would try to live there once we were married. It is beautiful where we live – however we are about 40 miles from any town to work in. It is getting redundant driving so far every day, when we could move closer. Also, I am about to finish my Masters degree and when I do, I would like to be closer to a good employer; I do not want to drive 1.5 hours to work daily.

I have tried like I promised, but I hate it here! He also has all his friends and family near, who are constantly at our home. His friends and family think I am different since I am from the city, and we have really clashed. They also feel that if I do not like the area, that I should just leave. As a matter of fact my Mother-in-Law asked me to leave, and her mother said I needed to leave before we had a child and he “gets stuck with me forever”.

Sadly my husband is too nice to say anything to them for comments like this. Needless to say, I am miserable. I cry myself to sleep, I am losing weight, and I desperately need my husband to see my point of view! I don’t want a divorce, and he says he doesn’t either; however, he also says he cannot move from here, and that it would be to hard on him.

I am a hard worker. I take care of the bills, the yard, the cooking, and cleaning. I also work two jobs while pursuing my Masters degree. Do you think I am being unfair in needing to be closer to my employer and civilization? I am on the verge of running away! Please help!

Beleaguered Wife

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