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At least one Sasstrology visitor has arrived here by googling why a Taurus man would become distant overnight. The short answer is: he wouldn’t. If he’s suddenly giving you the cold shoulder, he’s been unhappy for awhile. Read on for some clues as to why this might happen, and what you might do to prevent it.
First, let’s look at what the Taurus man is all about. He’s ruled by Venus, so he enjoys the sensual pleasures (good food, good sex). But Venus is about more than feeling good; at his core, Taurus represents the Venus archetype of survival. We’re talking back to basics: resources, procreation, security. This is earthy, primal Venus stuff (not the airy, Libra side).
Back to Basics
If there’s one word that can help you understand your Taurus man, it’s “survival.” Taurus is concerned with what what works for him and what makes his life run smoothly. No more, no less. He is inherently selfish; if you’re partnered with a Taurus man, the main reason is because he found a connection between your values and his values. He’s not interested in the challenge of something different. When he figures out what works for him, he sticks with it. These qualities also make him self-sufficient and internalized; he looks to himself (first) to see what works.
Once Taurus finds someone he can trust and relate to, it’s incredibly difficult for him to give that person up. Taurus does not enter into a relationship lightly, and he’s going to stick with his lover through thick and thin. He is not going to shut down at a moment’s notice, because Taurus changes slowly. Remember, he is fixated on his personal definition of security. It took a while for him to let you in, so it will take a while before he shuts you out.
It (Didn’t) Happen One Night
But he can cut himself off from his partner. If you wake up one morning and that current of reassuring Taurus warmth is suddenly switched off, you’re just seeing the final results. Taurus is so internalized, he probably didn’t let on that he was unhappy. Or he may have denied that anything was wrong at all (he is ruled by Venus, a sign that’s not big on conflict). But his frustrations have to reach a boiling point, and when they do it’s probably too late. Once your Taurus man shuts down, he’s already made the decision to move on. The “shut down” mode means that he’s decided his current relationship/partner no longer matches his values, or meets his needs. And (keeping the theme of survival in mind) once that happens, he figures there’s no point in wasting time trying to resurrect things.
The Final Straw(s)?
I’m not saying this behavior is fair. And not all Taurus men will act this way (you have to look at his entire chart to ascertain his relationship MO). But generally, this is how Taurus works. Now, what might have triggered his shut down? You cooking the wrong meal or saying the wrong thing may have been the final straw, but the issues would have built up over months, or even years. Perhaps he felt he couldn’t trust you anymore, or there was a major shift in your values/habits (so they no longer matched his). Also, tangible demonstrations of feelings are very important to Taurus; if these dry up, he’ll feel neglected.
There are no guarantees that you can keep any partner by your side (and some relationships are simply not meant to last). But there are some things you can do to encourage your Taurus man to stick around. First, just because he’s not complaining doesn’t mean that everything is ok. It can be easy to take the simple things for granted, because Taurus men are so reliable. But Taurus requires a steady stream of physical affection, fidelity and values that match his own. His needs are basic, but they require constant tending. You don’t have to get fancy, but you do have to be consistent. Changes (which are inevitable) should be introduced slowly, and it’s helpful to check in with him to see how he’s handling new routines, or if he’s even ok with them. Taurus can adapt to change, but he needs to do it in his own time.
So that’s the scoop on what might be behind a Taurus man’s retreat. He has basic needs that change very slowly (if they change at all). And as some of you have discovered, “basic” does not mean “easy.” But a relationship with a Taurus man is a long-term investment; put the effort in while things are going smoothly, and you’ll see some significant returns.
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