The Myth of the Perfect Conjunction
I think, of all the aspects in synastry, the most misinterpreted is the conjunction. It’s easy to understand why. There’s something romantic about a conjunction, something seductive. Two (or more) sometimes become one. How lovely. A basic archetype is at work here: the reconciliation of differing energies, and the merging of two separate forces. On the surface, this melding and union are rather Neptunian. This melding, however, is often an illusion. It is elusive and temporary.
Many of us began studying astrology because we wanted to find out how someone else ticked. This was usually a potential mate. As we studied charts, we got a particular thrill from discovering a conjunction, or many conjunctions. Now, in the hindsight of years and experience with synastry, the folly of this is laughable to me. I was as guilty as any, perhaps more so. I thought and dreamed of conjunctions as merging, passion, intensity, oneness, unspoken communication, and instant, intuitive understanding. Sure. I longed to see lots of conjunctions. If I couldn’t get them, I would settle for trines and sextiles. After all, the books told me that is what you need to make a go of it. They said to throw a bit of Saturn in there, and you’re riding off into the sunset together.
The Duality of Conjunctions
Well, no. Relationships need a purpose, and the soft aspects do not provide that. But that’s an article for another day. First of all, the conjunction is not considered a soft aspect. A lot of astrology newbies miss this. In fact, it’s a hard one, right alongside squares, oppositions, and semi-squares. So where does this ‘myth’ about the conjunction come from?
The truth is that there are two conjunctions: the conjunction of the hieros gamos (the sacred marriage) and the conjunction that occurs when the irresistible force meets the immovable object. Astrologically speaking, they can both occur within the same conjunction. A lot of people don’t know this, or they don’t prepare for it. Conjunctions carry the promise of bliss. At some level, we all long for bliss, and the sacred marriage is a powerful archetype. It represents bliss in all its forms—the joining of the material with the divine. Whether it’s the false bliss of drugs, alcohol, or sexual addiction, or the numinous bliss of sacred experience, we are still dealing with the archetype of the conjunctio.
The Sacred Marriage, most often represented by a conjunction of the Sun and the Moon, is one of the major steps in the alchemical process. It represents not the process that results in union, but union itself. It is the promise of a non-dual world, where we are at one with everything.
This is what we’re hoping for when we see conjunctions between our charts and the charts of those we love. We assume that this is the place where we won’t have to be apart, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually. And we believe we will join forces. We will be together forever—happily ever after. My Sun and your Moon, my Venus and your Mars—ah, it takes the breath away.
Conjunctions as an Impulsive Force
Alas, the fundamental numerical archetype behind the conjunction is the ‘one.’ It’s the circle divided by one. The ‘one’ is a very different animal. It is not entirely Neptunian; in fact, it is not Neptunian at all. It’s more like Mars. It is more like Aries: willful, headstrong, and a bit unpredictable. It’s a bit wild. The actions of the conjunction are not always well thought out. This is because the conjunction is impulsive. Its actions come entirely from within. It doesn’t bounce its ideas off any other planet before it makes a move.
Have you ever noticed when you have a conjunction of two or more planets tied to another by aspect? The conjunction will usually make the first move, and the other planet will fall into line behind it. This is unless the other planet is very powerfully placed. Having two or more planets on or around the same degree gives it a position of power. Now, if only it knew what it was doing…
Duality gives us a sense of ‘other,’ of partnership. We relate to something ‘out there.’ A conjunction can behave as if it’s complete within itself. However, within the conjunction itself, all is not peaceful. Each of the planets will fight for supremacy. They will tussle with one another over who has the purest expression.
Take a Moon/Uranus conjunction, for instance. The Moon, by its very nature, wants to belong. It wants things to feel comforting, comfortable, and familiar. With this conjunction, however, Uranus will often hijack the very things the Moon relies on to feel secure. It has easy access to this because it’s so near. Uranus knows the Moon and what the Moon needs. It then says, “Aha, but you didn’t know you need this…” as it pulls the comfy soft rug from under the Moon’s feet and takes it on a joyride through dangerous and unfamiliar territory.
Because it’s a conjunction, the Moon secretly does want to be swept up and taken away to new lands, but it was afraid of saying so.
Reconciliation and the Outer Planets
It may take a lifetime for this aspect to really come into its own. It takes time for Uranus to anchor itself to the lunar needs and for the Moon to accept its need for change. What the conjunction does is allow for swift and dramatic access to experience. We have an even more pronounced dramatic shift when the two planets straddle the cusp of two signs. Adjacent signs have a hard time relating. Sometimes these aspects are irreconcilable, like bad marriages.
Within a natal chart, some planets have an easier time reconciling their close proximity than others. The Moon will blend very willingly with Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. It will struggle, however, with Mars and Saturn. Mercury, being the changeable fellow he is, will happily take on different faces and masks to perform his duties. Venus may treat the other planet as a long-lost acolyte, but she will turn on him if she doesn’t get her due. Mars and Jupiter will blow their way through. Saturn will throw his somber weight around. But that’s nothing compared to when the three bullies move in. You know them, the hooligans: Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto. Don’t let Neptune fool you, he’s trouble under that pretty face.
The outer planets will attempt to change the nature of any planet they conjunct completely. They may do so in many intense and larger-than-life ways. It’s as though we’re meant to live out a personal drama of the outer planet’s creative force. This is usually very hard on us poor mortals. We can carry the archetype not only for ourselves but for those around us.
The Sun’s Integrating Force
Conjunctions with the Sun are different beings entirely. The Sun is magical that way. The Sun itself is an integrating and consolidating force. Only the Sun is stronger than anything that touches it, not including the Moon.
The Sun is our very life force. When he is in aspect, and especially when he is conjunct another planet, the creative power is there to integrate and absorb that planet’s true essence into his own light, enhancing our conscious awareness.
When the Sun and Pluto are conjunct, for example, life will automatically draw us into situations where our personal power is tested. We assume that it’s Pluto out to ‘get’ us. But it’s the Sun’s strength that really matters. The Sun works to integrate and absorb Pluto’s true power into our conscious awareness. It’s a subtle but important difference. You can see it very clearly when the Sun makes conjunctions via secondary progression. The entire chart is infused with that planet’s energy, tone for the duration of the conjunction, which lasts two or three years.
It isn’t an easy ride, but usually, we sense the purpose behind its manifestation when the Sun makes conjunctions.
Conjunctions in Synastry
So when two planets react so dramatically in this way, they may seem self-contained. But that’s not always the case.
But on other days, I may want to engage intimately when you just want some alone time or vice versa. Venus and Mars in conjunction promise attraction and desire, but not necessarily intimacy, openness, or emotional bonding. Their chemistry can quickly subside without the reinforcement of other elements in their astrological charts. They are, purely and simply, about attraction and desire. They can grow cold very easily without the rest of the charts to buoy them up.
When there are a lot of conjunctions between charts, life is very stimulating. It can also be exhausting. Everything about the relationship seems to be pitched at an extreme level: off again, on again, dramatic turns, and exaggerated circumstances. I’ve always felt that Romeo and Juliet had a mass of conjunctions between them. Nothing else could explain how everything went so very wrong for those two. The other thing that newbies don’t take into consideration, as they search for romantic conjunctions between charts, is that the expression of that planet is going to depend a lot on what it’s doing in the natal chart. This is why a list of aspects between charts is fairly useless in interpreting whether a couple will get along.
Say we have that longed-for Venus/Mars conjunction. But what if the Mars person has Mars square Uranus? That on-again, off-again energy would also make a square to your Venus. Bliss forever? I think not, especially if the Mars/Venus conjunction is in a sign that needs security. An air sign conjunction would fare better. Or what if an airy, “don’t fence me in” type was uncomfortable with his Mars in emotional Cancer? A woman with Venus conjunct that Mars in Cancer would only, eventually, increase the internal conflict. He would either find peace with that aspect of himself or feel the conflict wasn’t worth it and move on to other, less potent, Venus positions.
While planetary conjunctions reveal the core energies of a relationship, a truly profound understanding requires us to look deeper. The full spectrum of a partnership includes the lessons of the shadow self, which are often overlooked in traditional synastry. To explore this fascinating and essential part of your chart, you can find a comprehensive guide in our new article on Black Moon Lilith: A Comprehensive Guide to the Shadow Feminine in Astrology.
So go on, keep looking for those conjunctions. I dare you…
Concluding Summary
Ultimately, the conjunction in synastry is a paradox: it promises the sublime oneness of the hieros gamos while simultaneously delivering the relentless battle for dominance inherent in the number one. Rather than a guarantee of effortless compatibility, the conjunction is an impulsive force that ensures two planetary energies merge completely, intensifying their expression, for better or for worse. It sets the stage for rapid, dramatic experience—whether it’s the sudden, revolutionary pull of Uranus/Moon or the profound integration offered by the Sun. To interpret a conjunction is to ask not, “Will we merge?” but, “How will these two, now inseparable, energies struggle, grow, and ultimately transform us?” The answer, as your natal chart’s inner conflicts prove, is rarely simple, but always potent.
Originally Published Nov. 16 2010
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The Foundations Book: An Approach to Chart Synthesis by Dawn Bodrogi-Astrology
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