{"id":66503,"date":"2014-09-05T21:08:34","date_gmt":"2014-09-05T21:08:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theinnerwheel.com\/?p=3228"},"modified":"2014-09-05T21:08:34","modified_gmt":"2014-09-05T21:08:34","slug":"up-and-running-sort-of-again-and-more-on-chironmoon","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/astrologyblogger.com\/?p=66503","title":{"rendered":"Up and Running (sort of) Again: And More on Chiron\/Moon"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"scot<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\"Scottish<\/a><\/p>\n

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This is where I want to be today….somewhere alone in the peace and quiet of the Scottish countryside, minding my own business, feeling at home in a place I have no right to feel at home in, and not trapped here in the heat and humidity of Northern New Jersey, where the thermostat hit 90 F today and 90 per cent humidity, and humanity hit 100 on the disgruntlement meter.\u00a0 We are a crabby, impatient, complaining, demanding lot, we New Jersey people.\u00a0 Don’t believe me? \u00a0Just\u00a0hesitate at a red light for a moment here, or watch The Sopranos.\u00a0 And I need a vacation.<\/p>\n

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I’m supposed to be on a vacation of sorts.\u00a0 I’m supposed to be writing.\u00a0 And here I am, look, I’m writing.\u00a0 I’m supposed to be putting out a new issue of the Gyre with an update on BML.\u00a0 I’m supposed to be finishing my book on Chiron in synastry, “Beyond the Wound.”\u00a0 For those of you who are still young, fresh, and untainted by the pressures of time, a week may seem an eternity.\u00a0 But when you have passed your Chiron return, you know that a week is shorter than the blink of an eye.\u00a0 My brother and I laughed during my birthday phone call on Tuesday.\u00a0 How did we get here?\u00a0 We have the sense of having experienced somehow both more and less than we thought we would.\u00a0 I suppose that means we end up even.\u00a0 Saturn cradles us within space\/time and Chiron takes us beyond it.<\/p>\n

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I sometimes feel that there is a genuine war going on between Saturn and Chiron.\u00a0 Saturn rubs our noses in the here and now–take care of this, fix that, suck it up and do the drudge work.\u00a0 At the same time, Chiron is often saying, “No–look there–far, far away from here.\u00a0 Something you’ve never seen before, something that will deliver you…”\u00a0 It’s a hard decision to make, and we don’t always have time for both.\u00a0 If we are Saturn types and clean up the boring, necessary stuff before we move on, we often miss the juiciest piece of what Chiron has to offer, leaving Chiron’s message corrupted and confused.\u00a0 If we move to Chiron first and take care of Saturn later, we will often feel ungrounded and unprepared for the messages he is passing on to us.\u00a0 I have both strong in the chart.\u00a0 Saturn is conjunct my North Node, and Chiron is opposing my Moon.\u00a0 Sometimes, caught between the two vortices, the answer is paralysis, which is what I’ve been feeling lately.\u00a0 Faced with strong pulls from both, it’s difficult to make decisions as to what to do first.\u00a0 Saturn wins, of course.\u00a0 Saturn always wins.\u00a0 And that leaves us facing the futility and frustration of a Chiron longing to be liberated.\u00a0 Rather like a Chiron story where he actually does get chained to the rock for a moment or two and gets his liver chomped on by the hungry eagle.\u00a0 Don’t let that eagle symbolism get past you–it’s important.<\/p>\n

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But when one has Chiron\/Moon in hard aspect in the chart, it is often the case that the everyday pressures of life become a spiritual\u00a0burden.\u00a0 Those of us with Chiron\/Moon know that the ‘ordinary’ life is not possible for us.\u00a0 If we are one of the ‘lucky’ ones who also have Chiron opposite Uranus (as many of us do who were born in the last century), not only is the ordinary life not possible for us, but we know for certain that we are here to do something significant, to fulfil a task, and we may not know what that is until our Chiron return approaches.\u00a0 And even when we know that task, finding the time and place to fulfill it may become a great, and even exhausting, challenge.\u00a0 Ordinary life itself can seem very alien to Chiron\/Moon–someone has dropped us off in the wrong place and we would like to go home now, please.\u00a0 Chiron\/Moon is often born into a family that feels alien to its very way of being.\u00a0 Not that there isn’t any love–sometimes there isn’t, but often there is.\u00a0\u00a0But\u00a0\u00a0the family\u00a0must learn to love\u00a0what is not part of the ‘group’\u00a0(and learn that the alien has its own way of doing things)\u00a0and Chiron\/Moon needs to accept\u00a0that it will never belong and\u00a0at the same time find a home for itself that feels true to its being.\u00a0 Only then can it breathe free.\u00a0 Chiron\/Moon is often the wise one of the family, no matter what age it is.\u00a0 Chiron\/Moon can be destined to play the guide\/guru when it is very small.\u00a0 This responsibility can cause Chiron\/Moon to become very self-contained.<\/p>\n

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“Where is my real home?’ is often a question that obsesses Chiron\/Moon.\u00a0 Where do I belong?\u00a0 Sometimes Chiron\/Moon finds it, temporarily.\u00a0 A group of friends that can feel like family, a work situation where everyone is pursuing the same goal, a group of fellow artists or seekers.\u00a0 But most often, Chiron\/Moon will lose this sense of ‘home’ after a few years and must set out on the road again.\u00a0 And then one day, without warning, Chiron\/Moon stops seeking, because ‘home’ is everywhere.\u00a0 This is the universal consciousness that Chiron is preparing us for.\u00a0 “Home” and “Family” and all those other painful words become a welcome gateway to further awareness.\u00a0 Have I got there, yet?\u00a0 No, not a chance.\u00a0 Hence the longing for the Scottish countryside, which has always been a magical place for me.\u00a0 A place where I can breathe, far away from New Jersey.\u00a0 A number of years ago, after having lived in London (happily)\u00a0for a decade, I deliberately tested my notion of ‘home’ by returning to the place I grew up.\u00a0 (A strange thing to do, considering I spent most of my younger years figuring out how to get far away from here.)\u00a0 I wanted to see what this word, ‘home’ really meant.\u00a0 It was a long time living here before I realized that escaping home or finding a substitute home isn’t possible.\u00a0 What we try to run away from is our own sense of not belonging.\u00a0\u00a0 And with Chiron\/Moon, this is impossible.\u00a0 We have to accept our ‘outsider’ status and find a way to be useful.\u00a0 Our early experiences were preparing us to ask the right questions at the right time.<\/p>\n

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Any planet aligned with the Moon makes a big stamp on relationships.\u00a0\u00a0 The Moon is our comfort zone, our habitual behavior and our habitual emotional reactions.\u00a0 It is the repository of our emotional wisdom and experience.\u00a0 Chiron\/Moon can produce real loners, people who are happier without company, thanks, though they appreciate it when they are in the mood.\u00a0 It’s just too hard to explain the difference between ‘me’ and ‘you,’\u00a0 and even more\u00a0painful if you don’t feel or sense it.\u00a0 (Not that ‘you’ aren’t special in your own right, and Chiron\/Moon will feel that intensely.)\u00a0 Unless the other person also has Chiron\/Moon ties in the natal chart, they can never sense the\u00a0intense ‘other-ness’ that Chiron\/Moon carries deep within its being.\u00a0 In order for a Moon\/Chiron relationship to survive, this sense of ‘other-ness’ has to be respected.\u00a0 The person who loves Moon\/Chiron must understand that there are areas within Moon\/Chiron that he or she will never reach.\u00a0 The most hurtful thing you can do to Moon\/Chiron is insist that it is just like everyone else–Moon\/Chiron knows through hard experience that it is nothing like everyone else.\u00a0 It often spends its life trying to be like everyone else, and gives up only after great duress.\u00a0 Moon\/Chiron, more than anyone else, knows that we can only belong to ourselves.<\/p>\n

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There are great gifts to Moon\/Chiron, too, which I have written about before–the ability to transcend worlds (or this world, at least) at will.\u00a0 Even when one has the ability, keeping in touch with it is difficult–Saturn, again, overwhelming us.\u00a0 But it seems to me that this perceived conflict between Saturn and Chiron is something we all must work on if we are ever to find any peace within astrology itself.\u00a0 Astrological knowledge is useless unless it is anchored in reality, unless it teaches, unless it helps.\u00a0 It’s no good just pointing at the heavens and saying, Ah, well, I’ll blame the Uranus\/Pluto square today, or the Mercury retrograde, or a tough Saturn square.\u00a0 Chiron gives us the wisdom, but Saturn gives us the practical application, whether or not the two are actually in the mix in the skies.\u00a0 We need<\/em> the interchange between the two, in order to learn anything at all.\u00a0 It’s no good telling someone they are this way or that because they were born at a certain time.\u00a0 What do they do with the knowledge?\u00a0 We need to begin to understand that both Saturn and Chiron are working with one and the same universe, that there IS no difference between Saturn’s demands and Chiron’s.\u00a0\u00a0 When we understand that our ‘ordinary’ lives are as miraculous as the most poetic esoteric wisdom, we win.<\/p>\n

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I know, it’s not easy.\u00a0 Tell me about it.\u00a0 My very Saturn\/Neptune summer has included a flooded basement, burst pipes, a new water heater, a major shower leak,\u00a0 a leaking water meter,\u00a0 a major sloshing out of said basement, with black mold and all that entails, major paint jobs, huge sink holes in my bedroom floor which called for the entire floor to be replaced, and holes on either side of the upstairs banister.\u00a0 It felt as if the entire place was falling down around my head.\u00a0 And that’s just the water-related stuff.\u00a0 Even with Progressed Mercury now conjunct my natal Neptune and about to conjunct my progressed Neptune, I’m hard pressed to find the wisdom or poetry within it.\u00a0 And yet it’s there.\u00a0 It must be.\u00a0 Whether my faith in astrology is emerging to wash me clean for a new beginning, or\u00a0Neptune\u00a0and Saturn were\u00a0offended by my neglected plumbing system (Saturn rules pipes), there is meaning to it.\u00a0 I may not know what it is for years, but I know that it’s there.<\/p>\n

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Some of you have been asking for Part Two of Chiron\/Moon:\u00a0 The Endless Hunger.\u00a0 I’ve been saying I’ll write it, completely forgetting that I already wrote it.\u00a0 For those of you interested, it’s here:\u00a0http:\/\/theinnerwheel.com\/2013\/01\/28\/the-endless-hunger-of-chironmoon-part-two-hunger-and-other\/ <\/a><\/p>\n

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\"cool<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0             This is where I want to be today….somewhere alone in the peace and quiet of the Scottish countryside, minding my own business, feeling at home in a place I have no right to feel at home in, and not trapped here in the heat and humidity of Northern […]<\/p>\n

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